Wednesday 11 July 2018

It’s something that is often a thought in my mind. No matter what I’m doing the day, or who I’m with. It’s the looking down and trying to cover it, as I see reflections of myself in shop windows or mirrors. I almost feel disgusting for even going outside sometimes. 

It’s feeling like I’ve failed myself, for not being where I wanted to be in this moment. It doesn’t happen every day, but when it’s there, it appears in heaps and waves. And I’m unable to get it out of my mind. I fixate over it. Deciding against that outfit I originally loved, but I’m now against because of how I look. 

It’s a mental state of mind, and unfortunately for me, it’s just another addition to the list. But whenever I see myself; there’s always a negative, before a positive. 

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